Friday 13 August 2021

OUT DISTANCE THE RAIN

 

Thanks go once more to the Secret Poets who could see the shape of this poem so much more clearly than I could. You can read the previous draft here. I have though [all by myself] added a title.

Instagram Post


he was complimented on the rainbow

his photograph deftly captured

the fine graduation of colours


which was due to the large amount of water

that had tumbled from the sky

over such a short period of time


he added an explanation

how the deluge had almost

overpowered the windscreen wipers


he thought of the man in vest and shorts

who attempted to out distance the rain

how his pale pink top darkened


as he panted towards a solitary tree

whose scanty branches

could offer no shelter


There was some confusion over exactly what the narrator was doing with the photograph, why they needed to add a story, were they a journalist? I had not seen them as such. I was thinking they had been refining a story, a tale to tell others, as we all do.

The vision of others can help to improve our work beyond our imaginings. I suppose it's a riff on the old saying "many hands make light work". Something like many poets make for clarity.

Thank you Secrets.

I'm working on a poem that mentions Calypso, the sorceress and the music, so I am leaving you with Roaring Lion from 1938. The song concerns the mysterious conflagration of a number of theaters in Trinidad.

Until next time.

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