Friday, 12 March 2021

ALL SPACE AND SEA AND ROCKS


A revised poem again this post. 

To be honest I am finding it difficult to write at the moment. I am managing to revise though.

You can read the last version of this poem here.

Wallshill summer 2020


the three of them


stop


by the wire fence

by the flowers

by the memories


by the sign that reads

Danger Crumbling Cliffs


the other side is all space

and sea and rocks


they take in the parked cruise ship

waiting it out in Lyme Bay


the views are amazing he tells them


you only live once 


and like the gentleman he is

he parts the wires

so they can limbo through


doesn’t matter if you die

I have changed the final stanza around. Moving some of the man's conversation until after the three clamber through the fence.

I discussed the poem with the Secret Poets and we agreed that moving the final line of dialogue and making it the last line heightened the tension, making it somehow more final, a conclusion.


Brooke Sharkey has just played a concert at Green Note and it has a limited viewing period. If you watch it and I advise you to, Brooke is superb, as always, then please donate via Paypal. Musicians are suffering terribly at the moment.

I leave you with Brooke.

Until next time.

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