Friday 12 August 2022


Thanks must go to the Secret Poets yet again, both for such an enjoyable day on Monday and for their perceptive feedback on the revised poems in this post. 

This first poem has transformed from third to first person.

travelling in times of unusual weather

I had expected more delays

but the trains ran through the heatwave

slowed only by a series of failed signals

we were handed

plastic bottles of warm water

until the supply ran out

the heat in the final station

stole the sweat from our skin

this is how the world burns

You can read the earlier draft here. The use of first person makes it far more immediate.

This second poem has been winnowed down, each word appraised and only the essential ones remain.

Poems Are Everywhere

airborne invisible

they circle the world

one of us may catch

a whisper in the ear

some write down

the words they hear

he simply gave thanks

for every poem that chose him

I think it is now a sparer and better poem. You can read the earlier draft here. It is good practice to question every word in a poem and to ask if the poem works without it.

Annabelle Chvostek has just released a new video. You can buy the song here.

Until next time.

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